Do's, Don'ts and Advice for Finding Your Life Mate Internationally

The Truth About Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships seem to get romanticized a lot on popular media. People would tell you that the “distance makes the heart grow fonder” and you try to find comfort in those words. Truth to be told, it’s not as easy as how others perceive it to be. There are sets of challenges that will test your faith. Is it still worth the fight or should you just give up?

Today they’re sleeping right next to you, the next day they’re off to board their plane. You have to go through that every single time and it doesn’t get easier on their next trips. The uncertainty of where destiny takes you both is terrifying enough. Add the distance that’s keeping you apart. It makes you wonder; will it be like that for the rest of your relationship?

You see another couple holding hands and you would wish your partner was there to hold yours. You would feel lonely and the Skype sessions wouldn’t feel enough to comfort you. You would roll over to their side of the bed and it would feel cold because they’re not there. These are just a few of the things that they don’t talk about and sometimes, you wish they did.

How does it really feel to be in an international long distance relationship? What is it really like to have your loved one live miles and oceans away from you?

It Will Be Painful

Keeping the flame alive is hard work that would exhaust you eventually. You would long for the physical touch, the companionship, and everything that you should have in a relationship. You would feel your heart aching from the pain and your mind swirling from all the questions. Do they miss you too? Would they think of you too as they lie in bed?

It’s the photos that remind you of the memories you’ve shared when you were together that would hurt. It’s the plans that you have that would make you miss them harder. It’s the empty feeling that used to be filled with joy when they were beside you that would make you want them there again.

But, it’s also everything about them and everything in your relationship that you miss most that would make you remember why you started the long-distance relationship in the first place.

You Will Miss Out On a Lot

Your friends will talk about the arguments they’ve had with their partners and you won’t have anything to compare it to. You would have to skip night outs so you could have your regular video call session with your lover.

You won’t have someone to bring on holidays and family gatherings. You would have to eat alone in your favorite shops and celebrate occasions in front of computer screens. You would want them there because their texts, the photos, and the emoji symbols, they can never replace the warmth of their hugs and their presence.

If only you could experience those movie dates in person. If only they were there to cuddle with you to sleep. If only you didn’t have to think of all the “if only’s” on your mind. Nevertheless, you would miss out on all those things and it wouldn’t matter. It wouldn’t because you get to spend a minute longer with them.

One more minute to see their toothy smile, to look into their green eyes, and to hear their raspy voice say words that make your heart flutter. The world suddenly loses its value because nothing can compare to how much they mean to you.

Borrowed Hours and Bitter Taste of Reality

All the hardships you’ve been through feels like it’s worth it when you console yourself with the thought of seeing your partner again someday. The sound of the ticking clock becomes music to your ears, knowing that every second lost brings you closer to the day of their arrival.

And when you finally see them, when you finally can wrap them in your arms, you would wish that it could be like that forever. The sound of the ticking clock turns into the annoying sound you wish you could silence because every second that passes is time that’s lost from your time spent together.

You hold on to them tighter with every hug, you prolong each kiss on their lips, you try to make the most of your time with each other because you know the borrowed hours will soon pass. If only the world would stop spinning for once. If only you can extend the days they have left. If only they would stay. The taste of reality will always be the bitterest for you.

When they have to board that plane and all you have left are parting words and hopeful goodbyes, you try to stop the tears. You try to keep your heart from breaking. You hold on to the hope of reuniting with them again someday because one day with them feels like an eternity in heaven while living on earth. Borrowed hours they may be, but these borrowed hours always trump over the bitter taste of reality.

It's Not Bad, It's Just a Little Harder

There are times you feel like giving up. Sometime you feel like you just want to stop. But then, you remember. You remember how their lame jokes made you cackle hard, how your mind drowned at the sight of their eyes, how their simple compliment about your “nice shirt” won your heart and you realize that the distance between you isn’t so bad. Not at all. Sure, it’s a little harder than others but what assurance do you have that theirs is better than yours?

Every temporary goodbye is hard and you’re allowed to wallow in the sadness of the situation. You’re allowed to stay in bed, binge watches all the romantic movies that make you cry while eating your favorite ice cream

It’s okay to feel hurt and sad because nothing is romantic about being away from the person that means the world to you. When all the chips are down, you have yourself, your partner’s love, and your relationship to lean on. You think of them and you remember that the love you have is greater than any distance here on earth.

At the end of the day, the love you have for each other still outweighs the miles that are keeping you apart. You’re still willing to take the risk of being in a long distance relationship if it means loving and being loved by the one person you’re risking it all for. The truth about long distance relationships is that it’s worth so much more because the person you love is worthwhile.

Committed to an international long distance relationship? Let us know your story in the comment section below!