Avoid Miscommunication While Dating Overseas
Regular communication while dating overseas is a must, but having communication problems is inevitable. You should be prepared when this happens or, even better, determine the ways to avoid miscommunication. The following are some tips to improve your long-distance relationship:
Overcommunication can be good or bad.
Spending hours on phone calls or video calls is often the way to compensate for the long distance. But talking to each other 12 hours a day is going to take its toll on your relationship. One day, you will both get exhausted and bored of each other.
Excessive communication can be a sign of being possessive. The relationship will turn out to be toxic one day if that continues. So give more by doing less. Find the right moment to begin the call and to end the call.
Use a good communication app.
Texting and calling are good, but video-calling is better. Sometimes you also need to see facial expressions and gestures to improve communication. Choose an app that can do all three and use these modes. There are some good free international dating apps that you can use.
Go beyond the mundane.
It is normal to talk about your day. But make time to talk about deep conversations. Maybe you have something in mind you have been meaning to talk about or maybe an elephant in the room. Delicate topics need to be discussed when possible.
Consider each other’s mood.
Don’t expect you both feel the same every time. Maybe you are having a great day. Maybe he/she is not. This does not mean that you should not share any good news at all. Just try to read the room. Also, do not assume the other’s feelings. Ask instead of guessing. Clear and calm inquiry can help you identify how to avoid miscommunication online.
Be open. Be honest.
Hiding something from your lover is never a good idea, especially in long-distance relationships. If you both do so, you will likely be resentful to each other for not knowing the truth. If you want your relationship to last long term, you should be open to each other.
There is no harm in expressing your feelings. If he/she really cares about you, your emotions will be accepted and understood.
Some people are not comfortable with the idea that their partners hang out with their friends late at night. If your lover feels this way, you do not have to cut ties with your friends at all. That is not good either.
What you need to do is do not make any plans with your friends without letting him/her know. Reassure your lover that going out with your friends is something that he/she does not need to worry about.
But if you know that trouble is going to happen when you get drunk, just avoid going out. Hang out with them at a different time, maybe during daytime for a specific period and at a place that does not involve alcohol. Maintain balance with your relationship with your friends and your lover while avoiding problems.
Do things together virtually.
The good thing about today’s technology is that we can now reach out to people while doing other things. This is great, especially for those dating overseas. Even if you are far away from each other, you can still do things together online.
When you are video-calling, you can share activities with each other. You can both take a walk and show each other around. You can also show your lover what you have been doing, like cooking, working out, or shopping.
You can also plan to watch a movie together. Hitting play at the same time will make you feel that you are just beside each other. You can also recommend books and share what you think afterward. If you are into online gaming, you can play together. Maybe sing a song together or even learn a new hobby.
Find ways to make memories and share experiences even though you are living apart. Be creative and spontaneous.
If you can, visit your lover. A surprise or planned visit can fulfill the longing. Make time to hold each other’s hands and be intimate. Doing so can make your relationship grow and become stronger. There is nothing better than having the one you love in your arms when you can.
Send a memento.
When you could not visit, send him/her a gift. It could be anything that reminds you of your lover: a perfume, a song, an accessory. Simple, common things become valuable to someone if the sender attaches it with meaning that both of them can relate. That is why mementos are powerful in long-distance relationships.
These little things are what your lover can hold on to when you are not around. It does not have to be expensive. To some people, a handwritten love letter is even more valuable than jewellery.
A healthy relationship requires having time for yourself and your family. Your world does not have to revolve around your lover. Spend time with your family and friends. Pamper yourself. Work out, do a hobby, learn something new. Self-care is important in building healthy relationships.
Find time alone for yourself, and aim to be better every day. Also, when it’s time for you to be in touch with your lover again, you can update each other with the happenings in your families and friends.
Why Miscommunication Happens
While language barrier is often the cause, especially in online relationships, the lack of non-verbal communication can also be a factor. It is often cited that in communication, only 7% is verbal. Non-verbal communication is important in showing emotions.
But in the case of online dating, body language may not always be visible. Some things that cannot be expressed can cause problems in communication. These problems happen because we are humans. Long-distance relationship is not easy, but it can work out as long as you know how to manage things and to understand each other.
Miscommunication is not intended. It happens accidentally. You never want to hurt each other. It is just about how you said something or what you didn’t say. You will never be able to wipe out the problems in communication, there is always a way to reduce these when dating overseas.